Ep.19: How to Do Your Confinement Postpartum Practice during the Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year Festive Season - Fire Horse 2026

Preparing for your postpartum Confinement during Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year can be exciting but also emotionally complicated.

In this special episode of The Postpartum Wellness Show, Dr Kristal Lau explores how to navigate Confinement during the festive season, especially when family expectations, cultural traditions, and FOMO all intersect.

She discusses boundaries with elders, the emotional realities of postpartum recovery, and practical ways to still participate in celebrations while prioritizing healing and well-being.

This episode is especially helpful for new parents who are navigating their postpartum Confinement month during this festive season.

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EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS

• Why festive seasons can create pressure for new parents
• Navigating expectations from elders and extended family
• The emotional load of boundary setting during postpartum
• Understanding FOMO during cultural celebrations
• How food traditions and confinement practices may conflict
• Practical ways to celebrate CNY & LNY while prioritizing recovery

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QUOTES

“Your confinement period is just this one time. The festive season comes every year.”

“You enter postpartum depleted in every single way, so protecting your rest matters.”

“The whole point of confinement is to rest. That includes resting mentally and emotionally.”

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RESOURCES MENTIONED

Award-winning book Postpartum 30 by Dr Kristal Lau  - Chapter 3: Managing Expectations and Setting Boundaries in the Postpartum Year

Available via online retailers (link below!)

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CONNECT WITH DR KRISTAL LAU!

• Website: Bridges In Health
• Buy My Book! 'Postpartum 30: Thirty Days To A Nurtured Fourth Trimester'
• YouTube @drkristallau
• Instagram @mamaswingwoman
• LinkedIn @kristallau

Transcript

Welcome back to a special episode for The Postpartum Wellness Show with me, your host, Dr Kristal Lau. Today, we're going to talk about preparing for the confinement postpartum practice during the Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year time. This is the year of the fire horse in 2026. Before we start, a quick disclaimer.

This entire podcast and all the episodes are for educational and informational purposes only, so if you have any specific medical questions or medical concerns, please see and ask your healthcare providers.

So why do I want to specifically address the confinement practice during the festive season, especially this time for a lot of East Asians who are celebrating Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year? We have to understand that with a lot of cultural practices, a lot of expectations come along with it, especially when we're talking about East Asian cultures where the elders uphold the rules and what they say is the rule, essentially.

Thankfully, not a lot of our elders today behave like that, and a lot of elders, whether it's your in-law or your own family members, they do feel very protective of the new parent, the new baby, and the confinement practice. The confinement period is very sacred to ensure that the new mother, the new parent has enough time to rest, and that the itty bitty newborn baby isn't exposed to everybody out there because we all carry germs.

Now, those of you who are new to my podcast, when I say the word confinement, it is not jail time. It doesn't have the same meaning in the Western side. And I want to normalize the other meaning for the word confinement, which to a lot of Asians, especially East Asians, it means postpartum rest.

Because we have so much ethnicities within East Asia and so many other cultures in East Asia, that we call this time with different terms depending on our language. So in English overall, we say confinement, and it's understood that it's postpartum rest. So keep that in mind as you pursue and listen to all of the episodes in my podcast. When I say confinement, it means postpartum rest.

So it really depends on your family, whether they're the type to want to, you know, protect you during this time and say, yes, you know, stay home, rest. You don't have to show up for everything. We don't expect you because you've just had a baby. Stay home. You know, do what you need. We'll come feed you. We'll make sure you need everything you need.

Or you can have elders who really center themselves. What do I mean by that is they could tell you, oh sure, you know, get some rest, but make sure you come for, say, reunion dinner, or you make sure you have to come for the first day or whatever, because we have so and so visiting and they don't come often. We want to make sure they can see the new baby.

And that type of behavior can also present itself during this festive season because those kind of elders center themselves rather than center the younger generation, so to speak.

So it is... it can be challenging, and the important thing here is to communicate. And that's why those of you who want to read up more about setting boundaries and ideas and how to communicate with the elders in your family around this practice and setting boundaries as well, I wrote a whole chapter of it in my book, Postpartum 30. There's a link in the show notes, and you can grab this from any of your favorite online retailers.

And I give ideas on how you can explain to them, especially elders who are more stubborn and really want you to just show up and do things their way, even during this vulnerable time and tender moment. I have some kind of tricks there that you can use.

But bear in mind when it comes to a lot of cultural things, a lot of expectations in cultures, you can't really use data to explain and to set your boundaries. It's all very emotional.

So yes, this takes a lot of emotional load for you as the new parent to kind of so-called play games, essentially, because, you know, you're trying to anticipate what people will say when I set these rules and when I say what I want to do and what I don't want to do during this festive season, because I want to do my confinement during this time.

Those of you with spouses and partners, please get your spouse and partner to also listen to this episode because you all have to work as a team for the new mother, the new birthing parent. So much has already gone into the pregnancy and then the childbirth. You know, you enter postpartum depleted in every single way.

So when it comes to setting the boundaries and the communication with the elders, you know, those of you who have spouses and partners, or even friends and other family members who are there on your side in the ring, so to speak, you know, work together and have that person pull and carry the emotional load of standing up and setting and upholding those boundaries, okay? Because it can take a lot.

And for the new mother, the new birthing parent, your hormones literally start to go in a whole roller coaster stage as soon as you deliver baby and placenta. Okay?

So keep that in mind as you approach this festive season. And if people start asking questions, you know, if it's easier for you as well, come up with a list of answers that you can give.

Yeah, so it's important for me as someone who's very passionate about the topic of confinement, as well as wanting to preserve heritage on top of everything else that we talk about, that we talk about this practice, the confinement practice, in the context of this festive period because so much happens even for those of you who are living away from your extended family or you're living in a different country where you don't celebrate the Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year as much, but this is what you grew up with, or this is what you know.

So you literally feel the itch to celebrate, to participate. So what can you do during this time?

First, you have to understand that you will experience some FOMO, fear of missing out, because so much happens. You have, you know, reunion dinner and the whole Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year.

Well, I celebrate Chinese New Year because as a Malaysian, ethnically Chinese, that's what I celebrated growing up. So there's 15 days during this time, and that could vary depending on the ethnicity you are and, you know, different East Asian, Southeast Asians as well. So, you know, whatever your family celebrates, this is what you're used to growing up, and to not be able to participate fully in it, or to be, you know, not be able to replicate this celebration fully wherever you're living—wow, you really feel it in you.

I feel it every year ever since moving away from Malaysia, and especially when I moved away from Australia, when I didn't have my Malaysian friends to celebrate this with. Wow, you feel it deep down inside, so be prepared for that feeling.

And also recognize that you can have another Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year the following year, okay? Your confinement period is just this one time, honestly. Unless and if and when you have another child, yes, you can have another confinement experience, but you never know, and for some of you, you just want one child, right? And then you just have this one time to do the confinement experience.

So honestly, I'm going to be tough here and say prioritize your well-being, prioritize your confinement practice, prioritize your childbirth recovery time, okay?

Because for those of you who really follow the tradition as well, you will feel uncomfortable that you didn't do your confinement the way you wanted, or did it the way that you feel is enough or appropriate, and you will feel like you've missed the window. And then that kind of health belief carries along with you, and that's just part of being human. It's just how we are programmed, and health beliefs are very strong.

And it doesn't matter about evidence and all of that if the science says, oh, does confinement really improve well-being? You know, that's a topic for another episode.

But what I really want to address here is your health belief. And if you culturally believe that the confinement is so important for you, then prioritize that over the Chinese New Year and the Lunar New Year.

That said, the other challenges that come with doing your confinement during this time, besides the FOMO, is, as I've mentioned earlier, having elders and other family members who just center themselves and they want to see baby, I want to see baby, I want to see baby. It's very common.

Unfortunately, they say, yeah, sure, you know, we'll visit mom as well, but the fawning and all the attention really goes to the newborn baby, which, you know, it's expected. It's a brand new person in addition to the family and the extended family.

But it can be quite lonely and minimizing for the mother and the birthing parent, yeah, because, you know, it's... and then hormones, you feel all sorts. And especially if you're going into your second week postpartum and then the Chinese New Year, Lunar New Year falls around this time and you're experiencing baby blues—oh my goodness—that's a whole other ball game over there.

So keep in mind that you could encounter family members and extended family members who want to use this time to see baby and to center themselves and to satisfy their side of celebrating Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year, and they don't think enough about you as the new mother and the new parent. It's possible. Again, not all people are like that, but it's possible.

So that's a challenge. The other thing to consider is the food stuff. So for my family, we did reunion dinner and it's just a massive feast. And then the first day of Chinese New Year for my family, we did vegetarian food only because part of the tradition is day one is cleansing day. You go into this new year, you cleanse yourself, so you eat all the vegetarian foods.

And then day two and three, and a lot of... just a lot of snacks, a lot of grilled food. We have bak kwa, which is like really thinly grilled pork meat slices that—oh, it's been years since I had that, and I... I really miss that. Pardon me a little moment there.

So there's a lot of foods like this which are not really confinement friendly because the confinement food, in a real traditional sense, they are really meant for rejuvenating, for restoring the energy, the Qi, and all of those things. And for mothers and parents who are nursing, they help with the milk lactation, milk flow.

So a lot of the foods may not serve during Chinese New Year, Lunar New Year, may not be confinement friendly. And then that gives you the FOMO as well, and a huge challenge because food is such a big part of every culture, every culture, and how we connect with each other. So, you know, that's challenging when you are doing your confinement during this festive season.

But that's also not impossible though. You can still celebrate Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year while doing your confinement. The most important thing is you need to identify what you want during this time and what is your priority.

And of course my recommendation—again, this is not medical advice or anything like that, we're talking about cultural practice—yeah, and if you know your health belief is that this is so important for you, then of course I recommend that you prioritize the confinement practice.

And you can then brainstorm with your family and friends to say, right, I want to make sure I do my confinement month, but I also want to enjoy some of the Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year things. What can we do?

Right? Now, depending on your boundaries, what you accept and what is a hard no for you, create that list with your friends and your loved ones and then talk to them as well about what kind of foods could be adapted to be confinement friendly.

So again, I have a list in my book of ingredients, and also there is a lot of websites and other books that specifically talk about food and recipes for the confinement time, so use those recipes. Find recipes that are similar to foods that you would eat during this festive time so that you can have a bit of that taste and memory and reminder.

And the other thing is this. Sure, this is a time where we have confinement rules in place, but at the same time, you are a person. You have needs, you have desires, and this is a festive season. Allow yourself a little snack here and there.

And I highly recommend for desserts—yes, I do recommend don't have anything cold—but the great thing about Asian food, whether it's East Asian, South Asian, whatever Asian we are, there is always warm desserts. Yes, ‘tong sui’ in Cantonese is basically sweet soups. So plenty of those that families can make for you.

And you can get a lot of these ingredients even living in the West. If you go to an Asian grocery store, you can get a lot of the basic ingredients to make these tong sui at home. So do that and treat yourself a little bit during this time.

I mean, you did do a massive amount of work to grow one. And those of you who have twins and more, you grew life, you birthed life, whether you did it vaginally or through C-section, you brought life and you've gone through a very grueling birthing journey. You deserve to be treated. You deserve to have great food. You deserve to enjoy the things that you eat and also to enjoy this festive season.

So work with your family, work with your friends. I do have to say that because of my experience in the military family lifestyle, both my confinement times were quite isolated, a bit lonely, but you do the best that you can.

So those of you who find yourself in a very much more isolated area, if you can afford it and you have the resources to do it, try to order foods that are close as possible to the confinement foods or to the Chinese New Year or Lunar New Year type of delicacies that you can get.

Do your best, but a big note here is, you know, as much as you can plan, sometimes you will run into challenges where, you know, just logistically you can't access a lot of things. Please don't be so hard on yourself when you can't do everything exactly the way, you know, your elders or your other women in your family used to do, especially because of where you live.

Then pare back to what you can. Again, I do a lot of recommendations in my book on how to do a basic confinement practice so that you still get the crux and the most important parts of the practice, and you don't stress yourself out trying to do everything.

The whole point of the confinement month is to rest. That includes resting mentally and emotionally, which I know is not always possible. I mean, you're there caring for a newborn baby. Especially for a first parent, you're gonna always be stressed. You're gonna always have some kind of anxiety.

But at least the other parts where you can get some downtime, then allow yourself to get that downtime.

And for some of you, if absolutely not possible to celebrate the Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year and do a confinement, then, you know, prioritize the confinement and celebrate this festive season next year, okay?

Allow yourself to choose. Allow yourself to also let go of some things that may not work for you, but all in all, this is the start of the new year for East Asians, and you know, it is absolutely still possible for you to do a little bit here and there wherever you can.

Most importantly, enjoy yourself, whether you're going to do both your confinement and celebrate the Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year, or you're doing just one, enjoy yourself.

Gong Hei Fatt Choy, Gong Xi Fa Cai, which just means wishing you lots and lots of prosperity, wealth, auspiciousness, all the good things. Have a great start to the year of the fire horse. And those of you who've just had your baby, congratulations on having a fire horse baby.

Have a wonderful time preparing for this festive season. I know for a lot of you listening to this, this is midweek by the time this episode comes out. You're probably in the last parts of doing your spring cleaning to welcome the new year next week.

Again, when you are here with confinement postpartum, please do not stress yourself out too much with telling yourself you have to clean every single corner. Everything has to be new. I know some of us grew up with that. I definitely grew up with that.

As long as things are tidy, you're comfortable, you have things accessible for baby, for yourself, for the rest of your family, then that's most important.

Remember, when it comes to ushering in good vibes, good energy, welcoming the money god, Cai Shen Yeh, because why not, sometimes it's not just about appearances. You have to also have the vibes within yourself. Try your best to feel good, feel as relaxed as you can, feel open and welcoming.

And I'll leave you with this one thing, what my mom tells me to do that I still do today to ensure that the money god recognizes that you're there and ready to receive blessings: just leave, like, a light on in your house or the living room, the front door.

So if that's literally the only thing you can do in preparation for the Chinese New Year and Lunar New Year, then just do that. Don't worry about anything else in your home, okay?

So you guys, and ladies and gentlemen, take care. Congratulations on your new baby, on your new journey, and on your growing family, again, Gong Hei Fatt Choy! And I will see you next week.